Kate's Point of View

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A Lot Can Change in Eleven Years

On May 13, 2014

I’ve been doing some reflection about the words that appear here. About this space and what it means to me. How its evolved over time.I started blogging in October 2003 under the title “Kate’s Word of the Day.” Many of my initial posts were short and several pulled from email forwards (I’ve deleted most of those) or stories from other people. I accepted guest posts of widely varying quality. I posted sporadically and I was occasionally mean in what I wrote. Few of my posts included pictures because I was still using a film camera and it never occurred to me to plan far enough ahead to take a picture and get it developed and scan it in just for a blog post. (Digital cameras existed but I was a long way off from owning one.) I’m not positive, but when I started this blog, I don’t believe I even owned a cell phone yet.

Two days after my first blog post I went on my first date with my husband. Three years later we got engaged. Not long after I bought a home, which was followed by cohabitation and then marriage. (The last of which is oddly absent from my this space.) I have changed jobs, travelled around the world and both gained and lost loved ones – both family and friends.

So much has changed since October 2003. I view this space as more personal now in terms of what of me I share, but I’m also so much more aware of the public nature of what I write and its ramifications. When I look back at old posts, I cringe a little at how judgey and cynical I am, but I also think my writing was way funnier. I think my family all likes me more with my current style, so that’s a worth-it change.

When I started blogging, it was new and cool. Then I think it became viewed as slightly less-relevant medium. I’m thinking now it is post-ironic. Regardless, sharing and chronicling my thoughts all in this spot … it puts me in the company of many writers I admire and also has given me a wonderful record of my recent past.

Late to the Table

By Kate

On May 12, 2014

In books, rock

If I want to play the role of a hipster, I can do my part okay. I reviewed advanced copies of Chutes to Narrow by The Shins and Youth & Young Manhood from the Kings of Leon. I saw the White Stripes play to an audience of maybe 20 people, right before they blew up. I usually have a good eye on what new books and movies are out there. What I want to establish here is this: When it comes to pop-culture consumption, I can hold my own.And yet.

I arrived varying degrees of late to Friday Night Lights, The West Wing, Doc Martin and Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries. I discovered His Dark Materials long after publication and started the Bones series by Kathy Reichs after she’d already published a good 14 books. Music is a constant game of catch-up so when I’m not actively participating in the conversation, I’m playing like I know what’s up (“They sound familiar. Tell me more.” “Yeah, I think I remember hearing them.”) and hoping you don’t catch on.

Most recently I’ve been trying to catch-up midway through things. At one dinner party everybody was Mad Men this and Mad Men that. On our drive home that evening, Wonder Boy and I made the immediate decision to find out what the show was about. Through a combination of Netflix and on-demand TV, we’ve caught up. We recently did the same with Scandal (!) and I’m in the midst of listening to back-episodes of the Pop Culture Happy Hour and Professor Blastoff podcasts.

In the grand scheme of things, I know none of this matters. But the world in which I circulate is full of pop culture references and I like to keep up. Even where I have the obvious blind spots (Star Wars, LOTR movies, Harry Potter), I can usually follow along in the conversations well enough.

Every day I am sifting through so many things – books, magazines, movies, music, podcasts, articles, blogs, websites, social media… I have to pick and choose and I’m usually pretty confident about the choices I make. And then you attending a dinner party where you (and maybe your date) seem to be the only ones not in the know.

This Week In Books: When I Give Up and Teenage Love

By Kate

On May 5, 2014

In books

Last week I started and quickly gave up on The Great Arizona Orphan Abduction by Linda Gordon. I so rarely give up on books and yet I only made it about 30 pages into this one. I’m not sure where I heard about the book – I assume either NPR or Real Simple – but whatever I heard or read made me add the book to be To Read list. The text was so dry and the type so tiny. I couldn’t take it. A book should be something I am excited to open. Not something that feels like homework.Fortunately, the next book I tried was the absolutely lovely Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell. This is definitely a Young Adult book but because it is set in the 80s and so heavily references 80s music, it’s the perfect young adult book for not-so-young adults, like myself, to read.

So many of the YA books that are popular now feature a stereotypically attractive (even if they try to imply otherwise) females in their teens opposite slightly older, very hunky males. The protagonists in Eleanor & Park are portrayed as completely normal. Not beautiful but not ugly. Just … normal.

Park feels like he’s on the outside of things at school and among his friends thanks to being half-Asian and into comic books and alternative music. Eleanor hides her poverty and rough home situation with wackadoo outfits and a back-off attitude. The two share a love story that stands out from the standard YA books.

I think Eleanor & Park would be a great summer / beach read for people who haven’t yet checked it out.

A book review of Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell.

Put a Sock In It: Dealing with Negativity

By Kate

On May 2, 2014

In uncategorized

I try so hard to be upbeat. Sometimes I think I try too hard. There are events where I leave drained from trying to keep a smile pasted to my face. But I would rather be that annoyingly happy person than the one is is an energy suck with negativity.In Bossypants, Tina Fey says, ““Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.” It’s a variation of inspirational lines I’ve been spoon-fed since childhood, but I totally buy into it.

My variation of the saying is: You are only allowed to complain about something if you’re actively trying to fix it.

It’s basically permission to whine about whatever you want as long as you’re participating in problem-solving. As well as permission to say to everyone who isn’t trying to fix things, “Shove it. Stop complaining. Shut up.”

I’ll be the first to admit that this is a little self-serving. I have a tendency to over-volunteer for things. To speak up if I have an idea for ways something can be improved. I’m trying to learn to stop raising my hand quite so much, because it results in a lot of extra work.

The other option I’ve been employing for taking care of negativity, is surrounding myself with funny. On my commute to and from work, and while I get ready in the morning, I listen to Professor Blastoff and I laugh and laugh. On the way to work I pass a lot of kids walking to school and parents taking their kids to daycare. The tiny kids see my laughing in my car and seem to assume I’m smiling at them so they all wave to me. It’s very sweet. Wonder Boy and I have unsubscribed to some of the more negative shows on our DVR (What happened to you, Parenthood???) opting instead for lighter comedies or shows about murder and crime that I somehow enjoy.

Being forcedly upbeat and trying to laugh… It doesn’t solve all of the negativity around me, but it’s a start.

I’m aiming for this level of laughter. Out of frame in this image is the kangaroo
eating out of my hand, which, for some reason, sent me into hysterics.

My Week In Books: Digital Dating and the War in Iraq

By Kate

On April 28, 2014

In books, reviews

This past week was an odd one in terms of reading. I read (and reviewed) He Texted: The Ultimate Guide to Dating in the Digital Era by Lisa Winning and Carrie Henderson McDermott (2014). That was a pretty fluffy book and one I initially only read because I was sent a copy to review.I also finished The Yellow Birds by Kevin Powers (2012). These two books are so far apart from each other in style, topic, feel. The reason many books slip under the radar in terms of what I choose to review and what I skip are ones like The Yellow Birds. So important, but so, so heavy. But it’s important to expose ourselves to things that cause us discomfort. How else do we evolve our thinking and grow as people?

The Yellow Birds was nominated by the National Book Award in 2012, but lost out to The Round House by Louise Erdrich (on my To-Read list). NPR describes The Yellow Birds as a book whose “poetic language gives intimacy and intensity to the conflicts of war, and the conflicts within ourselves.” I rely on their words because I am sort of at a loss on how to aptly describe Powers’ book.

In theory I am against war. I hate the idea of the political maneuvering that exists to get one country ahead of another, to make one world leader more powerful than another, to get one elected official in office instead of another… And I know it’s more complicated than that and that war and violence are often used to end other wars and violence. But the loss of life… What The Yellow Birds illustrated for me is that loss of life takes many forms and sometimes it’s just a matter of losing yourself and all that you use to be while you are in the middle of a horrible situation, such as one where death and the smell of rotting flesh becomes normal.

It’s a terrible read. It’s a wonderful read because I think it, or something similar, is a necessary read. Without it, I don’t know how to have any perspective on what soldiers experience and on the decisions our leaders make for us.